The Relationship Revival Series
By Cindy Finch, LCSW
“Most relationships don’t fail from one big blow-up. They slowly unravel from unmet needs, unchecked assumptions, and unhealed pain. This series is your wake-up call—and your roadmap back.”
PART 1: The Truth About Emotional Adulthood
Want to save your closest relationships?
Start by becoming a Healthy Adult.
Emotionally mature people are like oxygen in a relationship—they don’t smother, they breathe life into the space between two people. They can love without needing to control. They can stay connected without blaming. They can even disagree without turning it into a war.
These people:
Respect others without being judgmental.
Know they are lovable and don't have to prove it.
Have made peace with their past.
Can celebrate others without feeling threatened.
Offer safe harbor, not a storm.
Own their baggage and still make room for love.
They’re the people you want on your team, in your family, and in your bed. Like the partner who, instead of escalating an argument, takes a breath and says, "I hear you. Let's try again." Or the one who brings you your favorite tea without being asked after a long day. Emotional maturity shows up in the quiet moments—the ones where grace overrides ego, and love shows up not in grand gestures, but in consistent kindness.
When you emotionally grow up, you stop competing with your partner and start collaborating. You stop keeping score and start cheering them on. You lift them up, not weigh them down. You become their greatest fan. In truth, growing up emotionally means you become good medicine to the people you love.
“Loving someone well isn’t just about romance—it’s about emotional maturity.”
💡 Try This: Ask your partner, “What’s one thing I could do this week to make you feel more emotionally safe?”
Learn How to Forgive
Bitterness is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.
Forgiveness is about you.
It’s about choosing freedom over resentment.
"The difference between holding onto a hurt or releasing it with forgiveness is like the difference between laying your head down on a pillow filled with thorns or a pillow filled with rose petals." — Loren Fischer
Forgiveness is not forgetting. It’s not condoning. And it doesn’t always mean reconciliation. But it is your ticket to peace.
If you’re keeping score in your relationship, ask yourself: what do I get from this superiority? And am I willing to trade connection for being right?
💡 Try This: Write down one hurt you're still holding onto and journal what it would look like to let it go.
📝 Worksheet available: “The Relationship Revival Workbook: A Weekly Check-In for Couples Who Want to Grow”
Coming up in Part 2: Why being physically present isn’t enough—and how to repair the disconnect.
